Stretched!

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“You can be so dependent on staying the same that you miss the flexibility that comes with Stretching” Sarah Jakes Roberts

Sarah shared a message on Stretching to capacity not too long ago and what a timely message for me… I’m in my season of stretching in every way, from my personal life to career life and what a Beautiful place to be! when everything around you just can’t remain the same.

2017 the year of being ready to be uncomfortable, ready to get out of your comfort zone and really discover what you’re made of! put your Faith to test and walk the talk!

I’ve had to learn that life doesn’t always go as you’d planned, but guess what I only felt secure the moment I decided to surrender to God’s plan and not mine… And the most amazing thing happened… God took over!

Situations that would have broken me to the point of giving up instead took me to a place of Peace that I honestly can’t explain to anyone even myself and that’s how I know it’s all Jesus… Grace in all situations that I naturally would have run away from- from as long as I could… but instead decided to face and realize that facing our fears is the only way to conquer them, the only way to heal, the only way to let go and the only way to move on…

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God is teaching me that sometimes in order for Him to Bless us, He first must stretch Us!… Stretch us to Capacity. For when you are stretched you can then fit through what God was doing in your life.

You cannot value success, until you have lost! so don’t fight loss, don’t mull over it for so long, instead pause and learn the lessons, embrace that journey and remember that your greatest weapon is your Obedience to God.

Joshua 8:1 “And The Lord said to Joshua, Fear not nor be dismayed. Take all the men of war with you, and arise go up to Ai; see, I have given into your hand the King of Ai, his people, his city, and his land”

No matter what we face in life, Jesus is the Mighty Warrior, the captain of the Host. He is our Leader, and He is leading His people in Victory. I do not believe that we have to live in fear. God has promised to provide for His Own. He has assured us, just as He did Joshua, that we will triumph if we listen to Him and Obey. Whatever obstacles are before you today, do not be afraid or dismayed, because God is with you.

Joshua 8:18 “Then the Lord said to Joshua, stretch out the javelin that is in your hand toward Ai, for I will give it into your hand. So Joshua stretched out the Javelin in his hand toward the city.”

In the middle of an Ambush God may ask you to be Still & to Heed to God’s word- like Joshua who was in the middle of battle & God instructed him to stop & STRETCH! So that He can take over, because by his own might Joshua would not have been able to conquer Ai.

God may be trying to speak to you in the midst of all the chaos… A Mind that is stretched can never go back to being the same! So Sometimes some stretching is necessary to get your breakthrough & most of all to remind us that we need some help, that we need His help. So as everything is happening pause for a minute & Heed to His instructions, Obey & have full & total surrender to Him & watch Him bring you to your Victory. Stop trying to face life alone! God’s got you & He will bring you through it & out of it.

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These shots are all courtesy of PhotographyByJuneJuly

A Collaboration with stylist Guru Connie for her look book coming soon:-)

Wearing a Jacket from Felicity Boutique, Sifa Towers, Lenana Road- 0735 00 96 92

 

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SUN DON’T SHINE IN THE SHADE

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Most of my life I’ve played small or downplayed who I am for fear of judgement or lack of acceptance… For too long I kept my views to myself for fear of being criticized or dressed down or over-dressed my body type for fear of being shunned, but what quality of Life is that really? God has designed each and every one of us uniquely different with a great Purpose!

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I strongly believe that I am who I am now because I finally embraced all that I am and shared that with the world!

If I could quote Elizabeth Gilbert– “Embrace the Glorious Mess that you are!” because we are all so far from perfect, winging it most of the time, but don’t run away from who you are or try to change who you are to fit in a box! that would be an injustice to God’s Master Work.

For as long as you look for someone else to validate who you are, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are and whose you are!

Remember the Sun don’t shine in the shade(you’ve got to say that American style;-) So stop playing small and Embrace all that you are!

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And the great thing about embracing and owning who we are is you hardly find yourself in a situation where you’re settling for less, because whenever your inner GPS is off kilter it means trouble awaits, so strive to be in tune with yourself and allow for that to lead you to make decisions.

Know that you were made to serve a purpose, and no one else has that same purpose, but one that is uniquely yours to seek and find… Where can you find it? Your maker! only your source has the hand-book! only He has the manual that will point you in the right direction.

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I’m well on my journey and excited at the prospects ahead because I know who I am! that is the most important part- know who you are and even more importantly- know who you are in the Lord for that is all that matters!- What HE says about you!

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KUMBUKA NI MUNGU PEKEE!! (Nyashinski)

 

Wearing the Brocade Collection by VIVO ACTIVE WEAR

Make-Up by WACUKA THIMBA

Hair by Mary of Black-Butterfly

Photography by KIMACHIA

Location- War Memorial Park

 

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New Season

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Happy New Month! and welcome the Season of Reflection…

What a year this has been for me, roller-coaster ride to say the least, I went through some of my darkest days this year- but one thing this year has taught me is the minute you’re just about to give up is usually the moment just before your Big BREAK-THROUGH!

October was my month of breakthroughs! My season to smile, to count my blessings and appreciate the journey, because the dark days made me stronger, humbled me, refined me and made me more aware of what I need to work on internally…

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And now I stand amazed when I smile and laugh, when I actually find myself looking back at stuff that used to bother me and I can finally laugh about it! because in those dark moments I never thought I’d make it through… But see God!

Joy always comes in the morning!!

So to anyone who may be discouraged remember that this moment too shall pass and you will surely smile again and remain confident that you see the Goodness of the Lord in the land of the living-ย  Psalm 27:13

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As we approach the end of yet another year granted to us- may we remain Grateful in all things, joyful in all situations and Live Enthusiastically, Forgive freely and Love with arms wide open!

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KANYE WEST- LOWLIGHTS

You want me to give you a testimony about my life
And how good he’s been to me
I don’t know what to tell you about him
I love him so much with all my heart and my soul
With every bone in my body I love him so much
Because he’s done so much for me.

Every morning
Every day of my life
I won’t always be crying tears
In the middle of the night, and I won’t always have to wake up
By myself wondering how I’m gonna get through the day
I won’t always have to think about what I’m gonna do
And how I’m gonna, how I’m gonna make it
How I’m gonna get there, because he…
He’s gonna be there for me
Some day the sky above will open up
And he will reach out his hand and guide me through
Oh yes he will
I won’t always be crying these tears
I won’t always be feeling so blue
Some day, he will open up the door for me
And call my name
Some day he will
I don’t know if anybody understands what that feels like.

No matter what you’ve been through
Or where you’ve been he’s always there
With his arms open wide
Accepting me
For who I am
And I love him so much
I couldn’t do it without him I wouldn’t want to
I’m crying now
It feels so good to be free
To be accepted for who you are and loved no matter what
Oh lord thank you
You are the joy of my life.

 

Wearing the BROCADE COLLECTION BY Wambui Kibue for VIVO ACTIVE WEAR

MAKUP By- WACUKA THIMBA

Hair by Mary of Blackbutterfly

Photography by KIMACHIA

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DO YOUR THING!

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“Do your thing. Do it unapologetically. Don’t be discouraged by criticism. You probably already know what they’re going to say. Pay no mind to the fear of failure. It’s more valuable than success. Take ownership, take chances, and have fun. And no matter what, don’t ever stop doing your thing” Ashor Roth

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I was having a conversation with my make-up artist, Wacuka as she was dolling me up for this shoot that has stuck with me days later…

You see so many times we give less of ourselves for fear of judgement or lack of acceptance and instead dim our shine or worse still feel the need to change who we essentially are to fit in! not realizing that we are in fact short changing ourselves, because we really only start to Live fully when we embrace our most Authentic Self!

When we exist from our most Authentic self, we begin to Live more honestly and come from a happier place, because we finally understand that we are who we are and uniquely who we are, so regardless of where we may be in life we won’t feel the urge to compare, to whine, to grumble, but be true to our journey, trust the process and keep learning and growing…

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“We need more people who are willing to demonstrate what it looks like to Risk and Endure failure, disappointment, and regret- people willing to feel their own hurt instead of working it out on other people, people willing to own their stories, live their values, and keep showing up” Brene Brown

To mess up you will! but keep showing up anyway! Don’t be afraid to be different, Own your story and keep doing your thing! Keep doing that thing that sparks the fire in you! keep doing that thing that makes you jump out of bed! Keep doing that thing that motivates you to be a better person each day…

“AUTHENTICITY IS THE DAILY PRACTICE OF LETTING GO OF WHO WE THINK WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AND EMBRACING WHO WE ARE”ย  Brene Brown

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DO YOUR THING Honey!

Dressed in VIVO ACTIVE WEAR

Make-Up by WACUKA THIMBA

Hair styled by Dennis of AMA DIVA

Photography by KIMACHIA

Location DUSIT D2

 

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GRIEVE

“Grieve… So that you can be free to feel something else”- Nayyirah Waheed

Her writing is so raw and honest, the kind of space that excites me, even when that space breaks me too…

You see sometimes we hold on to so much instead of letting go and allowing ourselves to Grieve… We then find ourselves carrying mountains you were only meant to climb and move on!

Looking back in my early twenties, there’s a lot I should have just climbed and moved on, but instead I carried some things well into my thirties when I finally had my painful aha moment that this one particular mountain was far to heavy for me to keep carrying!

Albeit letting Go of this mountain has not been an easy road, even though it’s the decision I made, but I’m realizing that some Mountains do take longer to shake off, especially if the investment was Grand and took longer, but I’m finally learning to Grieve the loss, so that I can be free to feel something else, because after 8years I’m learning that maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything, but unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so that you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.

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Yesterday Church was such a BIG Moment for me as I shared on my IG, but one thing I left out was the word I received from the sweetest old Lady who tapped me after the service to tell me “Seek His Face, Continue to Seek His Face and watch Him work through you” and then she left… That word touched me to the core and left me asking very many introspective questions;- Where am I headed? Is this it? and then feeling guilty for wanting more!

“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who were meant to be in the first place”

Maybe…

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Wearing-Turtle Neck and tights from VIVO ACTIVE WEAR

MakeUp by- WACUKA THIMBA

Photography by- DEEPAK

Location- DUSIT D2

 

 

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The Time is Ripe

Happy NEW MONTH! Can’t believe we’re already half way through the year!But where does the time go!? So much has happened in the first months of 2016 I’m looking forward to some much needed Stillness, though I’m now learning to Pause in the midst of all the chaos…

My year already has been one thing after another, online “stories” since January! and I call them stories because that’s all they are! some more fabricated than others, with the newest one making me a proud new owner of a BMW X5!!

My family & friends all saw that story and were rolling on the floor with laughter! wondering why they have never been privy to this information! because all those who know me, know how uneventful and boring my life really is, quite simple and quiet, still with my very first car, my “Dudu” as I fondly call it๐Ÿ˜ŠMy VW Polo!

So word to the wise, please don’t believe everything you hear or read! especially bearing in mind that people very easily create their own truths based on their perceptions and personal experiences.

Incidentally as I type this, I’m tagged on a list of “Celebs” who use enlargement pills for their hips and derriere! another big laugh out loud moment for me๐Ÿ˜‚because again, all those who know me, know this body structure runs in our family and sad fact is my current state is purely just me getting fatter๐Ÿ™ˆI’m getting older! so my hormones are all over the place, so if I eat badly and not work-out as I should, these are the results, but that’s probably too boring for blogs! they need to juice up the story with fabrications!

 

That said, there are 3 very valuable lessons 2016 is teaching me so far…

  • “Truth” is perception! it doesn’t matter what you do or say, what someone believes to be the Truth will continue to be their truth, so it really is never our role to convince otherwise, but continue as you were and focus on your journey.
  • “Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you will be criticized anyway” Eleanor Roosevelt- One of my all time favourite quotes, stick to your journey and learn to ignore the noise!
  • You owe NO ONE! any explanations about your Life! by the way imagine you really don’t! which has always been my struggle to want to be understood, but that should never be my concern and instead always remember the above points 1 & 2!

Today I came across a Blog- http://www.revelation.co/2013/01/06/number-30-in-the-bible-whats-the-significance-of-age-30-in-the-bible/#

Please do read it when you have a moment, it was so significant for me! because I also turn 30 in July(HAPPY DANCE!) an age I’ve probably been waiting for since I turned 20 I think, because I’ve always admired women in their thirties, to me that age bracket signifies coming into your own regardless of the noise, knowing who you are and being comfortable and confident about it๐Ÿ˜Š

I still do believe all of that, but it now runs much deeper for me…

As you know I am a Christian, a born again Christian who stopped shying away from this reality… I’m anything but perfect! But loving my Faith journey, especially this year seems to be my testing Ground! You see when your name and reputation is attacked continually one can easily Cocoon… But in actual fact that is when to pray harder, seek His face more and keep living out your Ministry! Attacks are all just evidence that the enemy is trying to discourage you, in turn cause you to feel unworthy and live a life of sin… But why let him win?

30! is such a SIGNIFICANT Number in the Bible!

  • Jesus waited until He was thirty to begin His Ministry!
  • Joseph was made second in command after Pharaoh at 30!
  • David became King at 30!

Just to name a few significant moments recorded in the Bible that all happened to the great men mentioned while in their thirties!

And for me I see no different… By God’s Grace my Ministry is currently being molded, this blog if you notice since I started 7months ago is driven by ministry… Yes my love for Fashion carries it, but God made it very clear to me to use this platform for His Glory! so to all my amazing family, friends and even strangers who continue to check up on me… THANK YOU๐Ÿ™๐ŸพFor me this is all a learning phase, there is a take away from all this that will help me as I share, reach out and impact that girl who writes me, or that woman who shares her crisis with me… I hear you, I’m praying with you and learning and growing with you.

For all things work out for the Good of those who Love Him & are called according to His Purpose in Christ Jesus๐Ÿ™๐Ÿพ Romans 8:28

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Be Authentically You!

Love Grace

๐Ÿ’š

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Let there be Room…

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In life, we think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem. The real truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together for a time, then they fall back apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that…

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Personal discovery and growth come from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy…

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Suffering comes from wishing things were different. Misery is self inflicted, when we are expecting the “ideal” to overcome the “actual”, or needing things (or people, or places) to be different for us so we can then be happy.

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Let the hard things in life break you. Let them effect you. Let them change you. Let these hard moments inform you. Let this pain be your teacher. The experiences of your life are trying to tell you something about yourself. Don’t cop out on that. Don’t run away and hide under your covers. Lean into it…

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What is the lesson in this wind? What is this storm trying to tell you? What will you learn if you face it with courage? With full honesty and- lean into it…

PEMA CHODRON

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DRESSED IN COWL HOODIE AND LEISURE PANTS FROM VIVO ACTIVE WEARย 

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NOT THIS!…

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I’m a Fan of Elizabeth Gilbert, her writing and Authenticity WOW’s! Me over and over… So today I want to share one of my favourite posts by her titled NOT THIS! Read it! Re-read it! Share it! and if you have a NOT THIS! situation in your life, I sure hope this piece will give you the courage to Walk…

Enjoy…

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Dear Ones –

Most of us, at some point in our lives (unless we have done everything perfectly…which is: nobody) will have to face a terrible moment in which we realize that we have somehow ended up in the wrong place โ€” or at least, in a very bad place.

Maybe we will have to admit that we are in the wrong job. Or the wrong relationship. With the wrong people around us. Living in the wrong neighborhood. Acting out on the wrong behaviors. Using the wrong substances. Pretending to believe things that we no longer believe. Pretending to be something we were never meant to be.

This moment of realization is seldom fun. In fact, it’s usually terrifying.

I call this moment of realization: NOT THIS.

Because sometimes that’s all you know, at such a moment.

All you know is: NOT THIS.

Sometimes that’s all you CAN know.

All you know is that some deep life force within you is saying, NOT THIS, and it won’t be silenced.

Your body is saying: NOT THIS.

Your heart is saying: NOT THIS.

Your soul is saying: NOT THIS.

But your brain can’t bring itself to say “NOT THIS”, because that would cause a serious problem. The problem is: You don’t have a Plan B in place. This is the only life you have. This is the only job you have. This is the only spouse you have. This is the only house you have. Your brain says, “It may not be great, but we have to put up with it, because there are no other options.” You’re not sure how you got here โ€” to this place of THIS โ€” but you sure as hell don’t know how to get out…

So your brain says: “WE NEED TO KEEP PUTTING UP WITH THIS, BECAUSE THIS IS ALL WE HAVE.”

But still, beating like a quiet drum, your body and your heart and your soul keep saying: NOT THIS…NOT THIS…NOT THIS.

I think some of the bravest people I have ever met were people who had the courage to say the words, “NOT THIS” outloud โ€” even before they had an alternative plan.

People who walked out of bad situations without knowing if there was a better situation on the horizon.

People who looked at the life they were in, and they said, “I don’t know what my life is supposed to be…but it’s NOT THIS.” And then they just…left.

I think my friend who walked out of a marriage after less than a year, and had to move back in with her mother (back into her childhood bedroom), and face the condemnation of the entire community while she slowly created a new life for herself. Everyone said, “If he’s not good enough for you, who will be?” She didn’t know. She didn’t know anything about what her life would look like now. But it started with her saying: NOT THIS.

I think of my friend who took her three young children away from a toxic marriage, despite that fact that her husband supported her and the kids financially…and the four of them (this woman and her three children) all slept in one bed together in a tiny studio apartment for a few years, while she struggled to build a new life. She was poor, she was scared, she was alone. But she had to listen to the voices within her that said, NOT THIS.

I think of friends who walked out of jobs โ€” with no job waiting for them. Because they said NOT THIS.

I think of friends who quit school, rather than keep pretending that they cared about this field of study anymore. And yes, they lost the scholarship. And yes, they ended up working at a fast food restaurant, while everyone else was getting degrees. And yes, it took them a while to figure out where to go next. But there was a relief at last in just surrendering to the holy, non-negotiable truth of NOT THIS.

I think of friends who bravely walked into AA meetings and just fell apart in front of a room full of total strangers, and said, NOT THIS.

I think of a friend who pulled her children out of Sunday School in the middle of church one Sunday because she’d had it with the judgment and self-righteousness of this particular church. Yes, it was her community. Yes, it was her tribe. But she physically couldn’t be in that building anymore without feeling that she would explode. She didn’t know where she was going, spiritually or within her community, but she said, NOT THIS. And walked out.

Rationally, it’s crazy to abandon a perfectly good life (or at least a familiar life) in order to jump into a mystery. No sane person would advise you to make such a leap, with no Plan B in place. We are supposed to be careful. We are supposed to be prudent.

And yet….

And yet.

If you keep ignoring the voices within you that say NOT THIS, just because you don’t know what to do, instead…you may end up stuck in NOT THIS forever.

You don’t need to know where you are going to admit that where you are standing right now is wrong.

The bravest thing to say can be these two words.

What comes next?

I don’t know. You don’t know. Nobody knows. It might be worse. It might be better. But whatever it is…? It’s NOT THIS.

ONWARD,
ELIZABETH GILBERT

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I hope her words above have given you the nudge you need… I know I’m massively Challenged and encouraged to first learn to Voice my NOT THIS! then next step learn to be okay with that reality, because even though I may not know what lies ahead… I know that this is NOT IT!! and that’s Okay…

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VIVO ACTIVE WEAR– Hooded Poncho- 3,950/-

Make-Up- WACUKA THIMBA

Photography- DEEPAK

Location- HOUSE OF WAINE

 

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Keep Showing Up…

“Sometimes it will take for you to Rise above the Noise and own your own story, good and bad, learn from each experience and Keep Showing Up!”

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You see we sometimes associate our story with a lot of shame, that we find ourselves crippled and unable to move. We stop doing the things we used to love, we run-away from our friends and family and hide from the world and wallow in our misery… When instead the better option is to learn from our short-comings and use them to become better versions of ourselves and inspire the next person.

I’ve had my fair share of the good, the bad and the ugly, done stuff that I’m not proud of, but I choose to learn from my indiscretions, allow for those moments to teach me lessons that I may have missed out before, and instead grow from that experience, wiser and better.

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I’ve been in relationships that were not very wise, but in that moment, at that particular time it was what I thought I needed, so the woman I am today has grown and learned from that…

My weight today is not where I want it to be, which again I am not proud of, but as I do something about it I’m still learning to own it! because it’s easier to sit around and be depressed and hide, but I think it’s very important to learn to embrace where you are in life and somehow make each stage work as you better yourself.

In Essence, Keep Showing up! don’t stop your life because you messed up, made a bad judgement call or wrong move! But instead keep moving as you continue to work on being the Best Version that you can possibly Beโค๏ธ

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Dress by VIVO ACTIVE WEAR– 3,950/-

Photography by DEEPAK

Make-Up Artist- WACUKA THIMBA

Location- HOUSE OF WAINE

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RISE AGAIN…

Sometimes you have to die a little on the inside in order to be reborn and RISE again Stronger and Wiser.

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Sometimes you have to die to your old ways, to the habits that hold you back from living the life you so desire…

At one point or another in our lives, we’ve all had those habits we’ve had to drop in-order for us to rise again, much wiser…

Want to loose weight? drop the carbs(after 3pm I hear), Want to grow? Invest in yourself and go back to school or write down that business plan and keep learning, Want to Love? Stop Fearing!

So many more other habits I could list down that stop us from moving and growing…

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Sometimes what we need to drop may not be that easy and sometimes even painful, especially when you know that whatever you may be fighting to keep in your life is only but a fraction of what you are in-fact capable of having if only you were brave enough to let go, grieve it and be open to new and better opportunities๐Ÿ˜Š

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My personal journey is one of dying to self… Choosing to love God with all of me, where the focus shifts from me to Him, to allow for Him to fulfill His Purpose in my Life.

I’m learning that this is probably one of those life-long journey’s… Each day we are molded like a potter and his clay, where He is the potter and we are the Clay, but in order for that process to be successful, we first must surrender to His Will, fighting and resisting only stalls the process and sets us back from reaching our goal!

So my grand lesson this year is to die to self and Rise again in Him! Stronger, Wiser and thriving, all for His Glory!

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VIVO JAQ Sleeveless Top- 2,250/-

VIVO JAQ Pencil Skirt- 2,950/-

MAKE-UP- Wacuka Thimba

PHOTOGRAPHY- Deepak

LOCATION- House Of Waine

 

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